Monday, 4 August 2014

A Question for Female Submissives: The Reality of Fantasy.

Hello all, this is aimed at you ladies out there, but guys feel free to comment with your thoughts also.

So reality can be a bitch can’t it? The practicalities of real life and the real world can stomp down hard on a fantasy. Female orgasm denial for example. Hygiene, the awkwardness of a bulky belt, the ability for women to orgasm through other means, these are just some of the main reasons why female chastity is much rarer than male chastity.  Yet as this blog shows, there are ladies who have orgasm denial and chastity fantasies. Having spoken to and played with a bunch of girls with denial fantasies, I have observed some patterns in the reasons / aspects of the fantasy. Some girls seem to see denial as part of their general submission to a dominant, others seem to enjoy the loss of control, the feeling of denial itself or even just the shear masochism of enduring the denial (either imposed or self inflicted). Others may see it as a challenge of will power. From what I can tell, of the girls that actually practice orgasm denial, 99.9% use will power instead of a device, and there are many more that have orgasm denial as a fantasy but are unable/unwilling to use willpower for any length of time. 

So I actually have two questions for you ladies out there:

Why do you enjoy the orgasm denial fantasy?  what aspects of it turn you on and do you know how the fantasy was initially created/discovered in you?

Let us suspend practicality for a moment and imagine there was a perfect chastity belt that could be worn safely, hygienically and securely, that fully prevented orgasm and could be worn indefinitely. If this belt appeared in front of you right now, and you had the option of locking it on yourself right now, for one year, no going back, no orgasm throughout. Would you take the opportunity to make the fantasy a reality? Try not to be swayed by how hot the fantasy of being able to be belted for a year is, try and actually truly imagine that in real life you were really presented with this option right now. Would you take it? or would you give up the only chance to experience your fantasy in full, brutal reality?

Bonus questions: 
If you answer question 1 above in detail and tell us what your fantasy sub name would be and some more about your fantasies / real D/s situation , I may make a caption based on you and your fantasy for the blog.

Happy reading and please comment! 
(I am trying to build a bit more of an interaction/community around the blog again, anyone up for playing some interactive games? remember my email is on the right as well)



  1. I enjoy the fantasy because of the loss of control but it's also a bit of what I'm used to. I was an early bloomer and every night had my fingers in my cunt, but I never had an orgasm until I was 16. Eight years of basically edging every night and never cumming. It's harder now when I edge, cause now I know 'how' to cum and what I'm missing if I don't. I don't do it as often now as I used to though, I spend more time horny and wanting to touch than I do actually teasing myself. I love being needy and wanting all the time. The idea that if someone offered their cock or slit to me, I'd dive into it immediately. Even now, when I don't tease or edge as often, I constantly ask my friends for a quick fuck and ask my Master to let me suck his cock or to fuck me, and he just laughs at me, and that makes me squirm.

    If you put that belt in front of me even at my most prudish moment, I'd lock it on within 20 minutes. Fifteen of those minutes would be a quick text chat with Master to make sure it was okay. The rest would be 'freaking out' anticipation.

    1. Kitty, awesome. It's nice to hear from a girl who is denied. And all I can say is that I share your disappointment that a TTcB cannot appear in front of you and deny you to the point of horny frustrated regret...

  2. Hi, been lurking for a while. Not usually very good at writing what I'm thinking but feeling in a expressive mood today. I think I enjoy the fantasy of orgasm denial for two main reasons, one the challenge of will power as you say and two for the sensation of feeling so horny that I'd burst.

    I am currently in a mostly vanilla relationship however I do love the power involved in orgasm denial when my partner get into the mood and says no.

    If a belt were to appear in front of me right the second I think I probably would put it on... eventually, after panicking for a bit first. Because as much as I like orgasm denial and the battle I have with myself I do give in far too often. I always like challenges and am quite competitive so that would probably win over the panic in the end.

  3. 1) I guess I'm a bit different, because I sort of prefer something as a physical barrier. For me, it's the imposition of another's will, and the drama and sexual tension of trying to fight back against it... sort of like predicament bondage, I suppose. I enjoy being teased, and it's a way to extend the teasing, while taking the options out of my hands. There's elements of submission also, of pleasing someone while having sacrificed for them at the same time.

    2) One year? Oh, I don't think I could jump into one year all at once. I much prefer the idea of having to earn rewards, and having the difficulty grow over time. There's more sexual tension in being drawn into the abyss gradually, incrementally, knowing that it's ultimately going to stretch limits.


  4. 1) I'm an interesting case. I actually have an extremely low libido. On my own, I could forget about pleasing myself for months. I have, before, gone 6 months simply because I didn't think about it and only broke that because I was mad at myself for it. So denial itself isn't difficult for me and is a constant part of my life.

    However, the choice of it being taken away sparks a whole mess of emotions in me. But the real thrill is the teasing. I like being teased, being in this constant state of need, being overwhelmed with sexual desire.. I don't get it often, so I crave that feeling and teasing does that for me. As much as I want the orgasm at the time, I know I'll be disappointed afterwards if I cum.

    I also like not having control over my libido because obviously I do nothing to for it on my own. So having someone or something in control of when I tease, when I edge, when I do/don't get to cum is something I really enjoy (and frankly, need). It's just not fun on my own and I want to be told what to do, otherwise it's just a disappointing masturbation session. :-/

    And honestly, I've been obsessed over Tease and Denial so long it's becoming a true fetish in the fact that I can't seem to cum unless I'm imagining being told I can't. Weird contradiction I've put myself into. lol

    As for things I've done, I'm a task kind of girl. I've linked the blog I very poorly kept up on with an old dom. ^.^' hehe

    2) A belt on it's own? No. I could do that to myself easily. A TTcB belt? Yes. In a heartbeat.

  5. Anon -

    For me, one of the greatest ironies of the real world given my particular set of predilections is that we have far better and effective chastity devices for men than for women and far better and more diverse erotic simulators (dildos, vibrators, sybians, etc...) for women than for men. If only it were the reverse, or at least equal. Ah well. :)

    My deepest appreciation and respect to those who do their best to walk the path of tease and denial, and to those who walk along with them and support and encourage them on their journey. It is good to hear from so many. Know that you are never alone. We have much to learn and celebrate from each other.

    Happy teasing and intense to denial to you all,